12. "Do you have a sledgehammer or a brick
handy?"
11. ". . . That’s right, not even
McGyver could fix it."
10. "So ~~ what did YOU do?"
9. "Duuuuude! Bummer!"
8. "Looks like you’re gonna need
some new dilythium crystals, Cap’n."
7. "Press 1 for Support. Press 2 in
you’re with 60 Minutes. Press 3 if you’re with FTC."
6. "We can fix this, but your’re
gonna need a butter knife, a roll of duct tape, and a car battery. . ."
5. "I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid
I can’t do that."
4. "In layman’s terms, we call
that the Hindenburg Effect."
3. "Hold on a second...Mom! Timmy’s
hitting me!"
2. "Okay, turn to page 523 in your
copy of Dianetics."
. . . And the Number 1 Thing You Don’t
Want to Hear from Tech Support. . .
1. "Please hold
for Mr. Gates’ attorney."
DPetty 
